Expectations and Present Moment Consciousness
A week at home, settling in and simply being present in my normal routines, and then I hopped on a plane to speak here in Orlando, FL at the FSMTA convention. After having traveled so much over the last six weeks I packed in no time flat, planned to have extra time in Orlando last night to settle in here and look over some things.
Then the summer weather intervened and enabled me to have a reminder about expectations. Instead of a quick flight here and an evening of rest, I spent three hours on the runway at IAD and then almost two hours in a Super Shuttle getting to my hotel. Needless to say it was time to invoke patience. And drop expectations.
Expectations can be tricky because often they are unconscious and the first signal to me when an expectation is not being met is that I feel irritable. I swear under my breath or maybe out loud if I am alone. I start blaming people and things around me. It is remarkable to observe.
I call this part of me the Expectation Driver. And it does drive me nuts…and right out of the present moment. The good news is that I recognize it more quickly now that I know it is a part of me. And I can firmly ask it to step aside and get out the drivers seat of my awareness.
So last night I took care of myself and breathed and read and kept asking it step aside as one impediment piled on top of another. And I gratefully fell into bed upon arrival at 1am.
This morning I am slowly arriving as I sit outdoors in this lush, tropical place eating breakfast. I can feel my back settling into my chair and the sweet warm breeze on my skin. My server has been wonderful allowing me to nibble and write. And, I have this lovely reminder to let go of expectations and just enjoy this wonderful time.